I wonder many things.

Love him much. I know I'm strong either way. I will be okay.

The hardest thing would be looking again for love, because I love him. I would want someone just like him (only the troubles erased), which isn't fair to anyone or myself.
I will regret the baby, the loving family I so hoped for, but now may never had. I see my father getting old. Close to 70. Grandchildren he would love, though he has never said a thing about it. I see myself, a teenager when I entered this relationship, near the end of my ovaries peek time. That stings.

I regret nothing, except the timing for my ovaries. Poor timing.

Still, I am a strong, lover of life and will continue to be a strong, lover of life. I would like to share my life with another strong, lover of live. Will it be him? Someone else? Maybe someone like him? Or just myself?

For a planner, the not knowing is hard.

We are both strong, passionate, lovers of life. We will be happy at the end of this when we are on to the next thing. We are just not at the end of this yet.


My one regret is that ovaries don't seem to hold-up forever. I would miss that. My daddy is getting older. I want him to get to enjoy being a grandpa. Oh, did he spoil me. I can only imagine.

Your cereal bowl still sits on the table, from breakfast when you still lived here.

The hamper, I discovered, is full of your clothes.

Our shelves contain pictures of us when we were happy.

The whole house is full of you, but when I go to bed at night, I find it empty.
I don't want remnants if I can't have you.

I hate to turn up out of the blue uninvited,
But I couldn't stay away, I couldn't fight it.
I'd hoped you'd see my face & that you'd be reminded,
That for me, it isn't over yet.

Nevermind, I'll find someone like you.
I wish nothing but the best for you too.
Don't forget me, I beg, I remember you said:-
"Sometimes it lasts in love but sometimes it hurts instead", yay.

Nothing compares, no worries or cares.
Regret's and mistakes they're memories made.
Who would have known how bittersweet this would taste?

~Adele

I'm okay. I wonder if your okay as well?

My husband moved out today. Oh sadness, I shall not let it overcome today.
Hope this will lead to a new beginning for US, rather than for each of us.

Bickering over laundry detergent and laptops because neither of us want this to be so.

Wasn't it just a few days ago that we went on a perfect date to get a break from this madness. Back to reality. Back to lonesomeness.